| Website image | URL of site archived | Date archived |
Archive type |
 | https://theonion.com/despondent-shohei-ohtani-figured-he-would-have-met-steve-o-after-8-years-in-u-s/ | Wed, 13 May 2026 15:14:44 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/cocktail-party-guest-cornered-by-joel-stein-1819565493/
(Orig site: https://web.archive.org/web/20240914045653/https://theonion.com/cocktail-party-guest-cornered-by-joel-stein-1819565493/)
| Tue, 21 Apr 2026 07:04:36 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/mlb-rookie-still-cant-believe-the-sunflower-seeds-are-free/ | Sat, 11 Apr 2026 17:23:28 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/panicked-dodgers-owner-has-no-idea-how-hes-going-to-come-up-with-414-million-payroll/ | Fri, 03 Apr 2026 16:17:02 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/chick-fil-a-announces-two-halves-of-buns-must-be-married-before-becoming-sandwich/?fbclid=IwY2xjawQuxeVleHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETFGOThjMU9pRDgyekRCTEtkc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHkoB_6F80R0y7xEmzXFajXpztXUgFoIm_qEo9QbmCqjvWBT3lcJhIyAA689C_aem_Eay39_hqKI2WiJg9buXpbQ | Tue, 24 Mar 2026 01:19:29 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/?fbclid=IwY2xjawQuw9FleHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETE2R2d4MGprellCRzJES2lkc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHuzCKhhBjLv_qcGnSAHYdqXf5Lp6bZC3azA8TN1TGR6XKtqdfs5f6OuvzTrc_aem_FeQ1Lf9aYXFrx89iV3oZsQ | Tue, 24 Mar 2026 01:19:18 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/newsletters/?fbclid=IwY2xjawQuxbRleHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETFGOThjMU9pRDgyekRCTEtkc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHoLBmPcR6xlMvMai755OpBVVDIQSwt6gjgzdsMGFUI1EhAq3o7hGDvaQgOmt_aem_FZLLuILYslhzQ-od8rkE2g | Tue, 24 Mar 2026 01:18:40 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://membership.theonion.com/?fbclid=IwY2xjawQuxa9leHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETFGOThjMU9pRDgyekRCTEtkc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHkoB_6F80R0y7xEmzXFajXpztXUgFoIm_qEo9QbmCqjvWBT3lcJhIyAA689C_aem_Eay39_hqKI2WiJg9buXpbQ | Tue, 24 Mar 2026 01:18:38 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/area-grandmother-comes-forward-as-banksy-1819571587/?fbclid=IwY2xjawQpjqZleHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETFaOGxzVlFlekVyejZReTg4c3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHqui0snPN_AjSgWZz_BJ48NkaCft7X4NgyA3szJ7h8wbI7dw4nTc9bAebJIT_aem_sIe9Z0vV9Fw0fPnCFpKVXA | Fri, 20 Mar 2026 02:22:30 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/theres-no-more-reassuring-voice-in-retirement-planning-1819584381/ | Sun, 15 Mar 2026 11:49:12 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://www.theonion.com/i-slapped-a-crying-child-and-called-him-a-nigger-and-i-1819584813
(Orig site: https://web.archive.org/web/20171106200432/https://www.theonion.com/i-slapped-a-crying-child-and-called-him-a-nigger-and-i-1819584813)
| Tue, 10 Mar 2026 23:32:23 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/prosecutors-unable-to-attend-live-nation-trial-after-scalpers-buy-every-ticket/?fbclid=IwY2xjawQbDGpleHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETFmTVIxbHdDVkplTFBlSHlTc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHoRB4YCS8Yn5N1pPmVdF5dwULGb_b4kLuJZWq_lhNf0qsLo5WfLW3SkK2oBb_aem_-QWAZRu5yZo3MxpprKnL6A | Mon, 09 Mar 2026 02:15:11 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/after-obama-victory-shrieking-white-hot-sphere-of-pure-1819595330/ | Mon, 02 Mar 2026 11:17:54 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/life-and-limbaugh-1845910736/ | Wed, 18 Feb 2026 17:14:25 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/tips-for-observing-lent/ | Tue, 17 Feb 2026 14:24:53 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/fuck-everything-were-doing-five-blades-1819584036/ | Mon, 09 Feb 2026 05:20:02 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://local.theonion.com/autistic-reporter-train-thankfully-unharmed-in-crash-t-1819595010
(Orig site: https://web.archive.org/web/20180314140803/https://local.theonion.com/autistic-reporter-train-thankfully-unharmed-in-crash-t-1819595010)
| Fri, 16 Jan 2026 10:21:19 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/plex-submits-35-bid-for-warner-bros/ | Tue, 09 Dec 2025 20:18:05 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/hirsute-yourself/ | Thu, 20 Nov 2025 17:14:17 GMT
| Archived webpage |
 | https://theonion.com/record-number-of-women-want-to-leave-u-s/ | Thu, 20 Nov 2025 02:10:51 GMT
| Archived webpage |
