Archives for https://theonion.com/

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Website image URL of site archived Date archivedArchive type
https://theonion.com/despondent-shohei-ohtani-figured-he-would-have-met-steve-o-after-8-years-in-u-s/Wed, 13 May 2026 15:14:44 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/cocktail-party-guest-cornered-by-joel-stein-1819565493/
(Orig site: https://web.archive.org/web/20240914045653/https://theonion.com/cocktail-party-guest-cornered-by-joel-stein-1819565493/)
Tue, 21 Apr 2026 07:04:36 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/mlb-rookie-still-cant-believe-the-sunflower-seeds-are-free/Sat, 11 Apr 2026 17:23:28 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/panicked-dodgers-owner-has-no-idea-how-hes-going-to-come-up-with-414-million-payroll/Fri, 03 Apr 2026 16:17:02 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/chick-fil-a-announces-two-halves-of-buns-must-be-married-before-becoming-sandwich/?fbclid=IwY2xjawQuxeVleHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETFGOThjMU9pRDgyekRCTEtkc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHkoB_6F80R0y7xEmzXFajXpztXUgFoIm_qEo9QbmCqjvWBT3lcJhIyAA689C_aem_Eay39_hqKI2WiJg9buXpbQTue, 24 Mar 2026 01:19:29 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/?fbclid=IwY2xjawQuw9FleHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETE2R2d4MGprellCRzJES2lkc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHuzCKhhBjLv_qcGnSAHYdqXf5Lp6bZC3azA8TN1TGR6XKtqdfs5f6OuvzTrc_aem_FeQ1Lf9aYXFrx89iV3oZsQTue, 24 Mar 2026 01:19:18 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/newsletters/?fbclid=IwY2xjawQuxbRleHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETFGOThjMU9pRDgyekRCTEtkc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHoLBmPcR6xlMvMai755OpBVVDIQSwt6gjgzdsMGFUI1EhAq3o7hGDvaQgOmt_aem_FZLLuILYslhzQ-od8rkE2gTue, 24 Mar 2026 01:18:40 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/area-grandmother-comes-forward-as-banksy-1819571587/?fbclid=IwY2xjawQpjqZleHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETFaOGxzVlFlekVyejZReTg4c3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHqui0snPN_AjSgWZz_BJ48NkaCft7X4NgyA3szJ7h8wbI7dw4nTc9bAebJIT_aem_sIe9Z0vV9Fw0fPnCFpKVXAFri, 20 Mar 2026 02:22:30 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/theres-no-more-reassuring-voice-in-retirement-planning-1819584381/Sun, 15 Mar 2026 11:49:12 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/prosecutors-unable-to-attend-live-nation-trial-after-scalpers-buy-every-ticket/?fbclid=IwY2xjawQbDGpleHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETFmTVIxbHdDVkplTFBlSHlTc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHoRB4YCS8Yn5N1pPmVdF5dwULGb_b4kLuJZWq_lhNf0qsLo5WfLW3SkK2oBb_aem_-QWAZRu5yZo3MxpprKnL6AMon, 09 Mar 2026 02:15:11 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/after-obama-victory-shrieking-white-hot-sphere-of-pure-1819595330/Mon, 02 Mar 2026 11:17:54 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/life-and-limbaugh-1845910736/Wed, 18 Feb 2026 17:14:25 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/tips-for-observing-lent/Tue, 17 Feb 2026 14:24:53 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/fuck-everything-were-doing-five-blades-1819584036/Mon, 09 Feb 2026 05:20:02 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/plex-submits-35-bid-for-warner-bros/Tue, 09 Dec 2025 20:18:05 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/hirsute-yourself/Thu, 20 Nov 2025 17:14:17 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/record-number-of-women-want-to-leave-u-s/Thu, 20 Nov 2025 02:10:51 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/trump-denies-writing-36-volume-comic-titled-don-and-jeff-time-pedophiles/Fri, 14 Nov 2025 03:41:44 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/bombshell-wall-street-journal-investigation-finds-tyler-robinson-once-had-trans-uber-driver/Tue, 16 Sep 2025 08:31:37 GMT Archived webpage
https://theonion.com/ice-has-gall-to-leave-raided-restaurant-negative-review/Sat, 05 Jul 2025 02:47:29 GMT Archived webpage


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