For years I have been umbrellaed underneath my husbands everything. Even his age. It’s not his fault or mine for not setting the record straight. Who wouldn’t want to be mistaken for a more youthful age? But! I lacked something that in the past that I have now. Gratitude. I feel no shame because my level of gratitude has far surpassed my shame and obliterated it . I have been through some stuff in my life. I have overcome a lot of inner demons. I have learned true forgiveness for myself and for the people who have betrayed my trust in times past. I have watched many be born and watched some very close friends pass on. I have an appreciation for the time I am given here on the planet that I never had before. I see hard moments through a different lens now. I see every minute as a gift that I am granted. Every breath as a bonus. I am no longer delusional about happiness. I think watching life slip through the hands of people I love has made me contemplate my own existence. It’s made me see just how important human connection is, and just how truly precious every minute of life is. If I am given the opportunity in the end to look back, what will matter? What does matter? I know now. I’m not wasting one more second. Now is it. Today. This moment is the biggest gift I could ever be given. Today I am 40 years. 7 years older than my husband. And very proud to have made it to 40. I feel as though I have lived lifetimes. And I know to some of you I am yet still a baby. But I do marvel at my children the way that an old soul should. I watch them learn and grow. I see the wisdom in their eyes yet the innocence in their expressions. I marvel. The way I imagine I will if I make it another 40 years. I marvel. As if I am sitting on a porch rocking in a chair back and forth. Back and forth back and fourth. Forth. Fourth. March Forth. March Fourth. That is me. A March fourth baby. 40 years old today and I have gratitude for every breath. So much so that I am crying tears of gratitude now. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. For time