King Charles: from throne room to Long Room

The King has agreed to be patron of Marylebone Cricket Club, where he has been a member since 1975, though he is seldom in St John’s Wood. The last royal I saw at Lord’s was Prince Andrew but I can see why they ducked him. In his former role as Duke of Cornwall, the King owned The Oval cricket ground and visited it during the Jubilee two years ago. He has an unorthodox approach to the game, once riding out to bat on horseback when playing for the RAF against the Lord’s Taverners. His father, the late Duke of Edinburgh, was more of a cricketer, as was his grandpa. Wisden’s obituary for George VI noted that as a teenager he took a unique hat-trick at Windsor comprising Edward VII and the future George V and Edward VIII. All bowled, thus proving that a straight beats three kings.

Imelda Staunton’s next role will be the title character in Hello, Dolly! at the London Palladium. Some of her friends are unfamiliar with the musical and one asked if she would be playing Dolly Parton. “I was enormously flattered,” Staunton says. Hello, Dolly! is, of course, nothing to do with country music. Instead, she will be playing a genetically modified sheep.

Bayonet-like wisdom

One of the many challenges facing freelance war reporters is sourcing protective kit. When Jen Stout was preparing to visit Ukraine, a flak jacket was vital but expensive for a freelancer. At the launch of her book Night Train to Odesa, Stout said a Kyiv spiv found her one, but she was surprised by his supplier. “It was a 1980s Met Police stab jacket,” she said. My elf, hoping for a safer assignment than drinking tepid prosecco at book launches, asked if she had any advice about reporting from the front line. “Don’t get near the Russians,” Stout said.

Mordaunt’s left behind

After the defection of two Tory MPs, people are asking if Natalie Elphicke is the most right-wing Labour MP since Oswald Mosley. Penny Mordaunt reached for the salad tray and described this as Operation Radish, an effort to convince people that Labour was not as red at heart as it looked on the outside. An odd move for a party recently led by Lettuce Liz. Mordaunt insisted, however, that she would not defect. “They would not be interested in me,” the Tory minister said. “I am too left-wing.”

A month before the 80th anniversary of D-Day, the comedian Al Murray rewatched The Longest Day for the podcast War Movie Theatre. Made 18 years after the event, some of the cast had been there. Richard Todd was on the Pegasus Bridge raid but declined to play himself. Murray notes that Todd’s lieutenant colonel was called Richard Pine-Coffin. “One of the greatest army names,” Murray says. “His nickname was Wooden Box.”

Labour’s shy gorilla

After the item on Denis Healey being asked to play Colonel Bogey with his armpits, Tim Richards tells me he was not the last Labour cabinet minister to get an odd request on radio. A new researcher on BBC Wales was once asked to book the Animal Magic presenter Johnny Morris to perform his famous gorilla noises. By mistake, he called John Morris, the former Welsh secretary and later attorney-general, who disappointingly declined the invitation to beat his chest.